I’ve become desperate.

I’ve become needy. Lonely is running through my veins, tears are flowing on my cheeks. I’m offically a high school graduate but I’ve never had a boyfriend, or a date, or even a kiss. I want and wish for a masculine touch. A boy to hold me. I don’t know who I am anymore around boys. Within the last week I have reached out to two guys who arn’t him. So you realize how weird that is for me? The one boy is gay and just because he acted like I wasn’t repulsive I let him lay on the couch with me at night, with his hands around me, his head on my chest, while I fell asleep. I that moment of falling into sleep, I savored the feeling of warmth and strength around me. I was in a nice place. I was peaceful. I can’t wait until that feeling comes from someone who loves me. I can’t wait to finally be loved. I’ve been starved of this my entire life, starved of love. When is it my turn?